Rouse's in Haiti

my friends KC

Quite a bit has been happening since I last posted.  God has been up to what He is always up to, changing lives and shaping them more into His image.  I'm so thankful that God doesn't allow us to just sit and remain comfortable in our current environments.  What tends to happen in my life is I get used to the routine and I start relying on my own strength and very seldom find myself completely dependent on God.  That past 7 months or so God has shaken me and brought me to a place that I need Him more than ever in my life.

Last November a team of 4 people went down to Cabaret Haiti to an orphanage that our association runs.  We were able to celebrate Thanksgiving while we were down there which was pretty funny because it is obviously an American holiday but we celebrated anyways.  We briefly taught the kids the meaning of the holiday and even went to the market, purchased 4 live turkeys which we killed, plucked, and fried like any good baptist would do.  I feel in love with Haiti that week and God reminded me of lots of conversations that my wife and I have had over the years about becoming missionaries.  I also was reminded of Stacie's dream of one day running an orphanage.  When I came home I didn't really talk about this to anyone though.  My life was going so good, I now had a little girl (Piper), ministry was going well, we were seeing real heart change take place in youth so I just sat on those thoughts.  January rolled around and God blessed us with another opportunity to adopt. This time a little boy (Hayden).  It's one thing to dream about being on the mission field when it's just you and your wife but when kids come into the picture its a different story.  It was sometime around the time of Hayden being placed with us that my pastor came to me and asked me a questions that I wasn't expecting.  He said "you feel called to Haiti don't you?"  "Um.....maybe" (knowing that the answer was YES!!!) that began a conversation that hasn't ended yet.  We began to talk about how our church FBC Orange Park could be the sending church of my family to Haiti to do the work God has called us to do.  First step though was to take a trip with Stacie to Haiti.  In March my church allowed and paid for us to go to Haiti for a few days to pray and talk with the missionaries that are currently working at the orphanage and doing a wonderful job.  We quickly realized that by us being there right now wouldn't help things all that much.  Instead God revealed that there is a story in Haiti that isn't being told very well in Jacksonville.  I believe that is my job, to tell the story.  Our goal is to be in Haiti soon, and I still feel like we will be there in a little over a year or so but there is a lot of work to be done right here in Jax.  Here's the amazing part.  God has called us to Haiti, but might be calling our church into this story also.  Our church is praying over the possibility of sponsoring my family for 3 years while we begin this new ministry.  That means FBC Orange Park is potentially going to pay my salary but I'm not going to be an "employee" of their church.  I will remain a member of FBCOP but I will be employed by the Jacksonville Baptist Association.  All this has been presented in different formats to my church family but no votes have happened yet.
I do have some personal request of you as you read this.  I beg for your prayers for me and my family.  At first the strongest feeling I had was guilt when I thought about taking my children to Haiti.  I felt guilty because I would be taking them away from their grandparents.  I felt guilty because I would be taking them away from the comforts of America. Guilty because that is what the enemy wanted me to feel.  Please pray for confidence that God is going to provide all the we NEED.  Pray for mine and Stacie's parents as they deal with the stress of knowing we are moving to a third world country.  Pray for Hayden's grandparents (the Spanglers) as they trust God and us to raise their grandson in a place they weren't expecting us to raise him.  Pray for our church family as we transition from a church framework to a kingdom framework. And pray for Cabaret Haiti.  Pray for the precious kids that we will get to invest in.  Pray for salvation to come.  For a mighty movement of God to shake the ground much different than it was shaken a couple years ago.

I'll be keeping you all updated on what is happening in our family and with Haiti. In the mean time please pray.


The Rouse Family

The Rouse Family Keeps Growing

I figured it was time for a family update blog since so much has changed since my last update. Many have read about our journey to adopt our daughter Piper if you haven't, here's a link about that story: Piper's Adoption Story. Our adoption was finalized on December 13th in the judges chambers in Polk County. It was a beautiful day spent with family. Piper's "tummy mommy" was there with us for the process. The judge said it was the first time he had seen the birth mom involved in the finalization procedure. The court system solidified what had already happened in our hearts and Piper legally became a Rouse. About a month after that date we got a very surprising phone call from our case worker with Piper's adoption. Stacie got the call asking if we would consider adopting a little 18 month old boy. We had really just hit our stride as a family and to be honest weren't really looking to adopt again for a while. We got some of the details and started praying for wisdom. The first person I talked to about this was my boss/pastor David Tarkington. After talking for awhile he asked a question that made clear what we were to do. He said in the middle of the night when you have two crying babies instead of one, and two dirty diapers to change will it be worth it? I quickly said well that's easy, of course! He then looked at me and said "well I think you have your answer then".

Over the next few days we found out more details surrounding this little boy. His mother's rights had already been terminated and he was being raised by his grandparents. To make this post shorter I'll save some of the details but basically his grandparents were praying for a christian couple that would be open to them being involved in his life and still have the role as "grandparents". Even though he was being placed by the state they had relationships with people at the Baptist Children's Home and asked them if they knew somebody that might fit this mold. Our case worker knew our relationship with Piper's birth mom was really open so she thought we would make a great fit. Our names were submitted to the state for consideration and just 2 weeks after we got the first phone call we were chosen to be Hayden's parents! We had to quickly learn the legalities of a state or adoption out of the foster system. We also had to learn to be the parents of two children only 8 months apart both under the age of 2 years. Not only had we gained a son but we became a part of the Spangler's family or they became a part of the Rouse family or maybe both, not really sure how that works lol. God has been so gracious and we love Hayden and his grandparents Victor and Ronni Spangler. Hayden was placed temporarily with us back in February but couldn't be place permanently until some legal stuff cleared. So Hayden was with us for a couple days then would have to go back to his grandparents house for the night then he would come right back to us. We feared this would be confusing for little Hayden but he was a champ and adjusted so well. He since then has been placed permanently with us and now we have a 90 day waiting period before we have a court date to make him legally a Rouse.

I can not even begin to say how blessed we are. God's sovereignty has been so evident and we are constantly in awe of how good our God is. Hayden is such a funny boy. He likes to dance, read books, watch Micky Mouse clubhouse, swim in our kiddie pool, snuggle, and go to the park. It took him a little while to warm up to Piper but now is very affectionate towards her. He gives her hugs and kisses with being prompted and whenever we go somewhere he quickly reminds us to not forget Piper. As I mentioned above His grandparents Victor and Ronni have been incredible and have made this transition go so smooth. We look forward to our families growing closer together.

So not much longer than a year ago we were a family of two and now we are a family of 4 and loving every second of it.

Foolish Pursuits

There has been much written recently about the pursuit of the American dream clashing with the pursuit of the cross. Men such as David Platt and Matt Chandler and many others have spoken extensively on this subject and I agree fully with them on the topic. Basically the message is that the American Dream is that we work hard at promoting ourselves and making something of ourselves, but the message of the cross is dying to self and making much of Christ with our lives. I love the message these men are preaching and I "like" all the post by these guys on facebook and re-tweet them regularly. The reality is however that while I like their message I have a hard time living it. This blog post isn't as much a deep new insight that you'll read and walk away from feeling challenged and talk about how smart I am. Instead I hope that it serves more as a confession of where I have fallen short of the pursuit of the cross.

The question I regularly challenge myself with is "what am I pursuing?" There are season's of my life where I can confidently say my pursuit is Jesus and His cross, but far to often my idol is comfort. I position myself to provide me and my family with the most comfortable lifestyle possible and still feel good about myself. I say the right things but my actions don't always match my words. I know in my head that Jesus came that I might have life to the fullest but a saving account and a retirement plan look pretty appealing too. My happiness to many times depends on Jesus and money, or Jesus and safety, or Jesus and success, or Jesus and a plan, or Jesus and health, or Jesus and fill in the blank. I want to be completely satisfied with Jesus. Matt Chandler said this "The most moronic thing that happens in our culture is that we already have stuff that does not satisfy us and so what we believe is that if we can get more of what does already not satisfy us we will be satisfied...now that is absolutely foolish". Lord free me from the pursuit of meaningless idols that lead to disappointment and emptiness.

sermon from Sunday September 4th

Last Sunday I had the honor of filling in for David Tarkington as he was away on our annual Men's trip. Here is a link that you can listen to it if you wish. The very beginning got cut off but we played the old game where I whisper a message to one person and they proceed to tell the message to the next person and so on. At the end of the sermon I get the message from the final person and explain how it fits.

http://getreal.typepad.com/get_real_with_david_tarki/2011/09/froot-loops-soy-milk-ryan-rouse.html

Is the Holy Spirit a Small Asian Woman?

Lately I've been really challenged by my lack of knowledge on the Holy Spirit. Being raised conservative Southern Baptist I think the topic was scary to talk about because if someone got the wrong idea they might start doing weird things in church. So instead of educating on what the role of the Holy Spirit is in the life of a believer we just ignored it all together. As a result I believe that my spiritual growth was stunted.

William P Young in his book "The Shack" (I book I do NOT endorse) illustrates the Holy Spirit as a small Asian woman named Sarayu (wind). In the book she is described as the "breathing of Life". So I have to be honest after reading this book I was very uneasy by the way Young attempts to shed light on the trinity. So please don't think I'm telling you if you want to understand the Holy Spirit or the trinity run out and pick up this book.

So just to be clear the Holy Spirit is not a small Asian woman. So what is the Holy Spirit. What is His role in my life? How can I know that the He is active in my life? After looking to the Holy Scriptures one of my favorite passages that sheds light on this topic is John 16:1-15. Jesus is teaching his disciples explaining to them that He is going to be leaving them, going back to the Father. He then goes on to tell them that it's a good thing He is leaving because if He were to not leave that the Helper would not come. This Helper He speaks of is the Holy Spirit. Jesus then goes on to tell His disciples that the Helper will convict the world concerning sin and righteousness and judgment. The first thing I learn here about the Holy Spirit is that He convicts people of sin. There have been many times I've sat in a church service and while listening to a preacher felt an overwhelming sense of guilt because of sin in my life. Apparently this wasn't because the speaker was really talented but because the Holy Spirit was working in my life illuminating sin that needed to be dealt with. Jesus continues to teach in this passage by saying "He (the Helper) will guide you into all the truth, for He will not speak on his own authority but whatever He hears He will Speak, and He will declare to You the things that are to come. He will glorify me, for He will take what is mine and declare it to you." This was pretty insightful to me. We learn here that the Holy Spirit does not act on His own authority but actually under the authority of Jesus. His job is to speak the things that Jesus says and to glorify Jesus.

How this hits home. If I want the Holy Spirit to guide and direct me I have to be about making much of Jesus. There are entire churches that are built around a moment caught up in the spirit. People leave talking about the Spirit. Unless I'm wrong here, scripture pretty clearly tell us that the role of the Holy Spirit is the illuminate sin in a persons life and to glorify Jesus. If we leave talking about the Holy Spirit then possibly that wasn't the Holy Spirit moving. The point of this blog isn't to discredit churches though. Instead I want to be led by the Spirit and I want others to be led by the Spirit and it seems like if we want the Holy Spirit to move, and teach, and guide then we have to be about Christ. "Spirit fall today, teach us how to love Jesus more."

Osama's Dead.....Why I will not Celebrate

I know many that read this blog will not agree with my view of what has happened and I'm okay with that. Before you read you must first know that I'm not writing to stir up any kind of anger and I'm for sure not trying to create sides because I think the last thing a lost and dying world needs is for Christians to be divided over yet another topic. I will try to approach this from a Biblical stance and leave as many of my own opinions out .

Obviously I'm talking about the recent death of Osama Bin Laden. With the rapid increase of people using social media it's so easy for a person to express themselves for the world to hear. I do feel however that Christians ought to be careful that status updates, tweets, and comments match the Bible we say we believe is without error.

I saw one status that was comparing the death of Osama to the triumphant victory of God over evil. The only problem with this illustration is the "god" in it is America.

I do not want this blog to appear political because I really couldn't care less about taking a political stand.

So what does the Bible have to say about our enemies?

Matthew 5:43-44

⁴³ “You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ ⁴⁴ But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you,

Luke 6:27-28

²⁷ “But to you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, ²⁸ bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you

Luke 6:35

³⁵ But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked.

I'm accused like most men of having "selected hearing". Meaning I only hear what I want to hear. I almost wonder if Christians have "selected obedience", we only obey what we like and the stuff that is hard to swallow or even understand we simply sweep it under the rug.

Why does Jesus tell us to love our enemy? When we think of the kingdom of God we have to view things from a perspective that many times is upside down from what is natural to us. That whole "the first shall be last" thing. Our natural desire is to celebrate the death of a "bad" man. In the kingdom of God however Scripture says "Have I any pleasure in the death of the wicked, declares the Lord God, and not rather that he should turn from his way and live?" Ezekiel 18:23 I think Jesus tells us to love our enemies because when we do people will realize that it is there is something different about us because NO ONE wants to love their enemies.

Interesting perspective: My first time to Africa was in 2002. Once I landed in country I began to see anti-american shirts. I also saw a pro Bin Laden shirt being worn. Most American's don't realize that in most every country around the world the "evil" ones are American's. It's all in what lens you are looking through. What if we began to look through the lens of Jesus? Who deserves to go to hell? Who is evil? The short answer is simply, all of us. No one is righteous, no not one. So this whole argument that is being thrown around in social media venue's that we should celebrate because Bin Laden was evil, let us be reminded that NO ONE deserves the grace that God has shown. It's pretty humbling for me to think that I deserved salvation just as much as Osama Bin Laden did.

Get off the on Ramp

The past month I've been really thinking about why Christ died on the cross? Another way to ask the same questions is why did Christ save me? These questions have led me into conversations with my Pastor which have led him to write similar blogs. As I look at most church goers in America I'm convinced that the answer to these questions have been answered wrong. I also feel a big part of why these questions have been answered wrong is because of unbiblical teaching and bad evangelism strategies. What has been taught time and time again is that the answer to the questions above is "Me" or "so I can go to heaven". At first glance these answers seem okay, but after thinking about this more I realize this is why most people are bored when they sit in church. This is also why Gandhi was able to say things like "I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ.” We have made the story about us. As pastor David put it yesterday, we have made the story about the rescued instead of the the rescuer. If the primary reason for Christ saving me was so I get to go to heaven then the purpose for Him saving me is complete at the moment of me accepting Him. All I have left to do is wait to die, then cash in my inheritance, and get my ticket to heaven. I believe the entire story is about God, even the cross part of the story. I believe the reason Christ died on the cross was to exalt God. I believe Christ saved me for His glory. I believe my life has a purpose, guess who the main character in my story is? It's not me, it GOD. I try to upstage the main character all the time when I make my life about me.

Let me illustrate it this way. Go back to the moment you gave your life to Christ. Might have been in vacation Bible school or after hearing some evangelist speak. Imagine that moment being like an on ramp to the interstate. The on ramp is significant in your journey but it isn't the final destination. Once you give your life to Christ you begin an amazing journey of exalting Christ with your life. For many church goers they have made the on ramp their destination and have never really began their journey. Imagine how boring life would be if our our literal destination was an on ramp. Just put the car in park and watch other cars pass you by. When we believe that the primary purpose for our salvation is to get to heaven then that is exactly what we have done in our spiritual life. No wonder we have so many bored Christians. So come on guys, lets put the car in drive and make our lives about exalting God.

How can you make your life about making much of Christ? Great questions! My answer, just open your eyes to the brokenness around you. Feed the hungry, clothe the naked, seek justice, invite your neighbor over who doesn't have any family, be a giver instead of a buyer, FOLLOW YOUR LEADER!

Our Little Journey to Find Piper and How to Love

As many of you know Stacie and I recently adopted little Piper Grace Rouse. Many do not know our story however so I thought I would finally sit down and tell our tale. God has been so evident in the whole process and my purpose in this life is to make much of Him, so I feel like I must tell.

About half way through January Stacie and I started taking our MAPP classes to put ourselves in a position to either adopt a baby or to become foster parents. We knew that God was leading us in this direction but it wasn't clear exactly what that was going to look like. Honestly we were thinking more about fostering to adopt so that would mean the child would be somewhere between 2-5 years old. Two weeks into our classes God revealed that He had other plans. We were made aware of a birth mom in Lakeland that was due the beginning of April. This is the part of the story that everything just went into fast forward and God began to show us that His plans are so much better than our own. Usually when a couple is going through MAPP classes there are several other couples going through the material at the same time so it's like a classroom setting. It just so happened that Stacie and I were the only couple that showed up for the class. Other couples had signed up but never came. The class usually takes 12 weeks to complete but because we were the only couple we were able to take 2 or 3 weeks worth of material every week we met. This was neccesary to have us qualified in time to be considered. We were told that we were being considered because we didn't have a list of things that the baby could or couldn't be. The baby to be born was bi-racial and for some reason white couples seeking adoption are only looking for white babies, so there were very little profiles to show the birth mother. Under the section where you are specifying what the type of baby we would prefer we said "human", (we weren't interested in alien babies at that time). We put together a profile of us as a couple in two days, submitted it, it got sent next day mail to Lakeland and we began to wait. I felt like I was elementary school again on the kick ball ball field nervous that I wouldn't be picked for the team. We thought we would know within a couple weeks if we had been chosen but we heard NOTHING. So we waited longer. The due date came and went and we still had not heard anything so in our minds Stacie and I had moved on. On March 12th Stacie and I were laying in our living room recovering from the 9 mile river run we had run that morning when the phone rang and we were told that our daughter had been born. I can not explain the emotion that was being felt in that moment but it was like a dam had broke and this overflow of happiness and joy overcame us. We were told that we could come the next day and meet our little girl. We got up REALLY early Sunday morning and headed to Lakeland. Because this was a open adoption the birth mom was still in the room and we would meet her for the first time that we met our daughter. We were really nervous about this because we didn't know what to expect. Once we got to Lakeland we accidently met the birth mom in the parking garage and immediatly connected like we had know each other for years. After about 10 minutes of us talking we went to the room to meet our little girl. Because you've been reading for awhile here's a "ahhh" picture to give you a break.

(this was taken about 2 minutes after we met her)

So here we are a new family. I'm still trying to convince myself that I'm a dad, and laying in the bed is this girl that just gave us the most amazing gift a person can give. What do you say? how do we thank her? Here is where a lot of people get nervous with our story. Stacie and I fell in love with Piper's "tummy mommy" (that's what we call her). We felt that God did not just allow us to cross paths so she could hand us a baby. We believe there is more to the story. She is part of our family. We talk on the phone. We have recently gone to lunch together. We have played with her 16 month daughter. Many people have told us that this is NOT a good idea. "what if she changes her mind?" WE DO NOT CARE what people tell us or how they think we should feel about her, we love her! We don't know where this relationship will go but we know that God has told us to love her and her family and we are glad that He has. Luke 6:32 says "“If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you?" specifically it's talking about loving your enemies so it's a little different because she is far from our enemy but I think the point here is that we don't get to chose who we love and who we don't love. Even when it doesn't make sense, and even when it might be scary....LOVE. This is the journey and story God has led us to, it's a crazy one but I don't know to many God stories that aren't crazy.....so my thought of the day....if the story you are living is boring, is that God's story for you or have you traded it in for you own?

here's our family photo...